Journeys

In school, they used to tell us that the family member who has the most problem with their loved one in a Nursing Home (or hospital, Assisted Living Facility, or Hospice) is the granddaughter of a male resident/patient.

This explanation given was simple, if not simplistic.  This young woman was the grandbaby who sat on Grandpa’s lap; who had Grandpa wrapped around her little finger, and so forth and so on.  Usually, this child has avoided/denied that Grandpa is getting old, so she has not visited in a while.  And when she finally, comes to see Grandpa, he is not the same Grandpa she remembers.

And what happens, usually?  The denial explodes and her life shatters into pieces.  Her eyes see he who is left in front of her.  Her heart and her mind cannot wrap themselves around this frailer, more wrinkled and more stooped image of Granddaddy, Poppi, Grandpa.

And often times, the staff become the target of her disbelief in the form of anger, rage and often unrealistic expectations.  That is understandable.  I promise you, it may not seem right or fair.  We cannot even honestly say we understand.  That would be a lie.  It is a lie.  All the staff can do is allow themselves to be the focus of those feelings until.  Until she can catch her own breath, release and recover from the blow and sooner or later began the journey of grief.

These and other experiences, too many to count have given me the opportunity to come to a point in my life where I want to give of what has so freely been given to me. 

I offer myself as a guide to families, no matter where they may be in this journey.  I have experienced this journey personally, when my parents began their journey home.  In my work experience, I tried to help families walk through their emotional, mental, physical and spiritual journey of walking their loved ones home.